Hello everybody – my thanks, as ever, for being patient whilst this next update finds its way on to the internet. I’m sorry there was no February or March update; these turned into yet more hard months, mainly for health reasons, and finding the time and more importantly the mental space to sit down and type out a thousand words about this kind of stuff was surprisingly hard. However, as of now I have four main things to update you all on:
So, my health has been less-than-great in the last few months since the previous update. On the plus side, the complication I discussed in previous posts seems to have faded away, and has just become something to keep an eye on. Naturally the complication has seriously boosted my several stress and misery levels, but right now it isn’t causing too many issues. Far more worrying is the fact that a month and a half ago, I got a symptom of the thing that almost killed me four years ago for the first time (this first sign being a particular kind of pain/discomfort). This, as I’m sure you can appreciate, is a strong emotional trigger for me, and I have not been in a good place these past few weeks. I now have to wait at least another month or two in order to see whether or not any more symptoms develop, or whether it was/is “just” a false alarm. That said, this new symptom itself has faded, which is either a good sign (it means nothing) or a bad sign (the first symptom also faded last time before the deadly symptoms kicked in), but the lack of being constantly reminded of it has meant I’ve been able to actually get stuff done. However, I want to add that I have deeply appreciated the support I’ve got here, on Twitter, and elsewhere, especially from others with serious or long-term medical issues. It really has meant a huge amount to me. So: hopefully this will the end of it, no more symptoms will appear, a month or two from now I can be confident the disease hasn’t returned, and can, again, start to properly get back on my feet. If not… then we’ll have to see.
In times when I’ve been able to think straight, work has been going well. The University of Alberta has proven to be a really great working environment, both in terms of people and in terms of the practical, everyday structuring of work – which is to say, nobody minds if I work from home, or in a cafe, rather than from my office. I’m now a good 25% of the way through developing and writing my next book, and all that has just been sent off to the publisher we (my co-author and I) want to work with for the project. Once the contract is handled, I’ll be able to actually announce it a little more “formally” than I’ve been doing so far; it’s about streaming, and I can’t wait to show the outline to you all. I also have more several papers coming out soon, which will be posted here (and the new site) as and when: one about analysing crosswords and other paper puzzle games from the perspective of understanding them as pre-digital “casual games”; one about cheating in card games within casinos; one about depictions of “deep play” in cinema, so films like Battle Royale, The Hunger Games, Would You Rather, Saw, 13 Tzameti, etc; and at least two more on Twitch and live streaming (focused around disabilities and mental health, and emotional labour, respectively). More soon on this front…
In the last few weeks, for pretty much the first time since my health took such a serious downtown around August last year, I’ve actually opened up the URR file, taken a look around, familiarised myself with it a little bit, and started to figure out what precisely needs doing to get the 0.8 release out. As ever, it remains achingly close to completion; I need some more time on the conversation system, then some bug-fixing, and then we’re done. I still hope for a return in April, assuming my health does not take a turn for the, er, even worse. However, as I’ve said before, it just can’t be a priority for me at the moment, as much as I wish it could, but hopefully, finally, things might change soon. I hate how much this is dragging on, and I hate how much the project has floundered; but life is very tough at the moment.
I’ve started the development work on a new website (one does, after all, have to proceed on the assumption that one will live to a normal age, right?) and I’m pleased with some ideas that have been coming together. As before, the plan is still to create a new website to combine my academic and game dev stuff, and also to deal with some of the issues on this site. When I set up this website I didn’t really know what I was doing, and now the site is really beginning to buckle under its own weight. Frankly, I lack both the technical ability and the spare mental space to fix it, despite the very patient replies from my hosting company’s customer support. For that reason as well, it’s time to move to a new site. On this note: if anyone reading this knows of an experienced website designer with a good body of work I can look at (even better if they make games-related websites), so let me know. The new website is probably going to be WordPress again, but I’m looking to pay for a totally custom layout. If you know anyone who might be interested in this work – and also design work on two other websites for work projects – do let me know. All will obviously be paid!
In the next couple of months I have quite a few engagements coming up; after two-thirds of a year of illness and not really having the strength to travel (although moving country obviously didn’t help), it’s good to be getting out there again. I’m off to a conference in Canada in mid-April to talk about disclosure statements in video game reviews, then I’m Skyping into a UK conference to talk about Twitch streamers and moderators, after which in late April I’ve been invited to speak at the Rio Esports Forum on the labour of the Esports career, then a talk here in Edmonton in early-May on videogames-and-gambling, and finally a Skype into Prague to talk about Esports cheating and game integrity. My health issues have really meant I just haven’t had the time nor the strength to do any of these things, but with the potential improvements above, I’m in a slightly better place now and strong enough to resume some wider dissemination and engagement. But still – the last eight months have been rough, and in many ways have pushed me back to a place I thought and hoped I’d left behind years ago. As ever, my profound appreciation goes out to all those who read this blog – hopefully the rest of 2018 will continue to pick up. I do hope you are all well, and I’ll update you all again soon, hopefully in the much nearer future than this time…